Primates in the Cave FUNDAMENTALS
It’s in our genes to fornicate.
A pleasure we much advocate.
Males rampant with machismo gait
while most females self-decorate. 004
Small tits implants exaggerate.
Armpits and legs, we depilate.
Ply creams so skin won’t corrugate
and blemishes don’t replicate. 008
Wield loofahs to exfoliate,
add rich scents to infatuate.
With baubles bright that pendulate
in efforts to become ornate. 012
From heads protrude our ears lobate
with pins and studs we can punctate
and dangle earrings: orbs prolate;
the same both sides to counterweight. 016
And draped across our omoplate,
gold necklaces with charms lunate.
On fingers, stones of silicate
that jewellers facet and serrate. 020
Wristlets the size of a vamplate
complete our task to titillate.
The sole goal just to illustrate
personas that can captivate. 024
We pucker up and osculate
preparing to inseminate.
Fast comes the time to penetrate.
We clinch secure and consummate. 028
When swimming sperm capacitate
the female seed can germinate.
A nine-month sentence to gestate
in warm dark caves that incubate. 032
The bulging tummy we palpate
and feel a being palpitate.
The swollen breasts start to lactate.
New life begins to maturate. 036
With great success we procreate.
Hold lovingly our neonate
and back slap to congratulate
the ease with which we propagate. 040
Though if we’re gay instead of straight
or just prefer to masturbate,
men can their penis elongate
and harmlessly ejaculate. 044
Or women can the hips gyrate
and with a dildo self-vibrate.
Then sperm and eggs stay inchoate
and children won’t proliferate. 048
Progeny back to top
Us kids that do eventuate
wave chubby fingers digitate.
Our little feet folks titivate.
We squirm and squeal and cachinnate. 052
Our parents note each unique trait
and each one they enumerate.
Our comfort they facilitate.
Their lives to us they dedicate. 056
Our first names we abbreviate.
For Katerina call me Kate,
Ignatius is condensed to Nate
or Iggy should you be a mate. 060
Our birth records they laminate.
Our nurseries they constellate.
Against most germs they vaccinate.
They’re thorough to inoculate. 064
We each become a state inmate.
We’re sent to schools that educate,
though some would say indoctrinate,
and with peers we confederate. 068
Chrome braces for our mouths dentate.
To stop decay we fluoridate.
Pains our mums ameliorate,
abrasions they iodinate. 072
Each year we grin for our portrait
to document our fast growth rate.
Fad diets to control our weight,
replace sugar with cyclamate. 076
For culture one trip to the Tate.
In sport some bones we dislocate.
Take tests teachers invigilate
and learn how to procrastinate. 080
In English told to lucubrate,
instructed when to hyphenate,
in math we’re taught to tabulate
and times-tables ingeminate. 084
Learn languages we mistranslate,
in history events that predate,
in chemistry lixiviate,
in music how to syncopate. 088
Boys weird out with skulls cucullate.
For A.D.D. we medicate.
Stray cats we like to lapidate.
Frail weaklings we excruciate. 092
Meanwhile young girls start to pupate
till we emerge as ripe jailbait.
By twelve it’s time to menstruate.
For forty years we’ll ovulate. 096
Safe sex pamphlets elucidate
about how we should conjugate.
Our parents we alienate.
We seek to individuate. 100
Into adults we’ll graduate
and in most ways just imitate
the homes where we originate,
so, cycles thus perpetuate. 104
in most foods that we masticate.
Our drinks the makers caffeinate:
we think this will rejuvenate. 108
It doesn’t take a diplomate
to know we shouldn’t drink phosphate.
Don’t smoke, detox, decaffeinate;
use diets that desalinate. 112
With good food we capacitate.
Eat badly, we dilapidate.
Food oils we hydrogenate.
Kill fungi with Merthiolate. 116
When wanting to exhilarate
it’s common to intoxicate
with alcohols that lubricate:
fermented from the vines baccate. 120
But after all we drank and ate
we ingest much bicarbonate.
As stomach ulcers aggravate
our mouth glands start to salivate. 124
We loudly belch and flatulate.
Cascades we then regurgitate.
Leave puddles where we urinate
then wait in queues to defecate. 128
In slurred speech we alliterate.
Our throbbing dull heads acerbate.
For fast relief we aspirate
a few breaths of amyl nitrate. 132
We pop some pills to stimulate
nerve systems to accelerate.
We like to soar and elevate
to worlds beyond those of our fate. 136
Or search for something to sedate
and help us to eradicate
the demons we hallucinate
in darkened realms within our pate. 140
Tents & Temples back to top
The social structures we create;
clear boundaries delineate.
The rich from poor will insulate
in regions of prime real estate. 144
We’re safe behind a stately gate.
Steel bars the craftsmen lanceolate.
With rich motifs they foliate:
in copper they electroplate. 148
Stone columns on a stylobate
accent façades we crenellate.
High towers we can fenestrate
and ramparts we machicolate. 152
Our in-ground pools we chlorinate.
Twee gardens caretakers curate.
Our worries just evaporate
as guests, in awe, felicitate. 156
Our riches help us levitate,
to heights where we luxuriate
in rooms of marble and glazed slate
that chandeliers irradiate. 160
The unwelcome can’t infiltrate
these lavish chateaus Latinate
where decorators floriate
and fresh brewed coffees percolate. 164
These palaces instantiate
the wealth that we accumulate.
A life of lords we simulate.
No way will we die intestate. 168
Our money we can fecundate:
to own the best, ours to dictate.
This role we will not abdicate.
Our comforts we’ll not abnegate. 172
On holidays we aviate
to beaches where we estivate.
Lounge in the sun with our comate.
Relax so we don’t herniate. 176
But those who can’t participate
towards middle class will gravitate.
To drab suburbs we’ll relocate:
submissively assimilate. 180
We dutifully domesticate
and fence disputes we arbitrate;
to mortgages capitulate
and on consumer goods fixate. 184
Devotedly we renovate.
In heated spas we macerate
and hope we’ll never liquidate. 188
In slums, the poorer populate;
exposed to rents that strangulate.
Cold flats where heat don’t radiate
and bleak nights make breath condensate. 192
We ask landlords to fumigate:
the vermin to exterminate.
In pantries roaches nauseate
and filthy rats intimidate. 196
From noise the walls reverberate.
The neighbours’ fights reiterate.
The airless hallways suffocate.
Five door locks we must situate. 200
Still worse, we that itinerate;
our shelters we’ve had to vacate.
Soup kitchens graciously donate
the hot meals we ingurgitate. 204
Most druggies cannot motivate
enough to rehabilitate.
Drunks find it hard to moderate
a fondness to inebriate. 208
And on the streets gangs demarcate,
select turfs and consolidate.
New members we initiate.
Trespassers we assassinate. 212